Casinos

In the last year, I stayed in a Casino for 3 nights on a business trip. And I realized I don't like them. In fact, I hate them. Let me count the ways:

1. Our room was all zebra print and dark purple with plenty of teak.
2. High cheese factor with padded walls everywhere, mirrored ceilings, staff members in ridiculous neon uniforms.
3. I got slammed in the elevator doors. That's right. The first night, I'm going for the elevator, the doors are starting to close. I implemented a strategy that has always worked for me: I threw my body between the closing doors expecting them to bounce open. Instead, they slammed on my shoulder, cut my other arm, and I had a baseball size bruise on the other arm to show for it.
4. Neon lights do not a good morning make. The first morning, I went down to the cafe', bleary eyed, and ready for my early morning caffeine. I was not prepared, however, to be greeted by the same endless neon lights, mirrors, fuscia velvet upholstery, bars open, and slot machines ringing just like the night before. It was a rude way to wake up.

I hear new casinos are not like this. I have my doubts.